Hi Angel, You were on my mind a lot last night. Usually I think of you while I’m in the shower getting ready for the day or when I’m about to go to sleep. I like to say ‘good morning’ or ‘good night’ or ‘how are things up there?’ It allows me to imagine thatContinue reading “Letter #3”
Category Archives: Uncategorized
27
I’ve felt like I was 27 years old (whatever that’s supposed to feel like) already for most of this year. Maybe it’s because the months dragged in the wake of Covid-19 or because there was so much learning that occurred this year. Whatever the reason was, this birthday felt like my age ‘label’ finally caughtContinue reading “27”
Body Image After Miscarriage
It’s been a quiet two weeks since Thanksgiving. I haven’t known what to write because frankly there isn’t much to share. On a spiritual and emotional level I’m in a much better place. Heui Chan and I are laughing a lot more and just riding out work and life until Christmas. I suppose the bitContinue reading “Body Image After Miscarriage”
8 weeks in
Hi, Muffin. (That’s what I’ve started to call you.) We’re almost at 8 weeks together and I’m itching to get to 9 weeks so I can have my ultrasound. The emotions still aren’t quite as high as they were for Angel. All I can do at this point is make sure I’m taking care ofContinue reading “8 weeks in”
Thanksgiving
Somehow we’ve made it to Thanksgiving. What a year, right? At a quick glance the year feels like a wash, wasted, depressing. Covid-19, unrest across the world, unrest in our country, death, loss, sickness, division. It seemed like one thing led to another until we were all left wondering, ‘Okay, what now? What else couldContinue reading “Thanksgiving”
The Two of Us
Heui Chan and I asked our friend, Liz, to take pictures of us. Heech suggested, before we were even pregnant, that we should do an annual photoshoot starting this year. But when we lost the baby I couldn’t begin to consider a photoshoot with just the two of us. We weren’t going to be anContinue reading “The Two of Us”
The Full Story
Recently a friend of ours gifted me a book about miscarriage from a Christian lens. (For anyone interested it’s called Grace Like Scarlett: Grieving with Hope after Miscarriage and Loss by Adriel Booker.) I’ve only read the first section, but it’s already an intense read. The raw details of her miscarriages and emotions so closelyContinue reading “The Full Story”
fighting for joy
After a solid 7 days of relief and healthy coping, this week’s gloomy weather led to another dip into sadness and anxiety. My imagination was not a good friend to me. It’s incredible that the same brain that produces lyrics and poetry and blogs to help me cope can stab me in the back andContinue reading “fighting for joy”
snowballs
I read Chrissy Teigen’s instagram post about her miscarriage and cried in solidarity with her. While in many ways a very different experience, there are elements of her account that take me back to the heartbreak of my miscarriage. The anxiety of bleeding slowly and steadily for days. Looking in the toilet and trying toContinue reading “snowballs”
Protected: breathing
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Drops of Jules 